I wish I was an art major 

Stem is just so stuffy, ughhh, I just want to draw pretty pictures and write stupid little stories, ya know, as is the human condition, but instead I must tell the computer to bee boo boo, bop boo boo bop instead of bee boo boo, boo boo bop like it is currently doing. Ya know?  bee boo boo bee? Bop? BEE!?! BOO BOO BOP!!!

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We have a 3D printer! We are unstoppable! 🙂

Advanced additive manufacturing techniques are at the forefront of modern manufacturing. And with advancements in sustainable filament, and energy-efficient thermal units, we can print cleaner than ever! Glenndynamics is committed to doing absolutely nothing for longer than anyone else. and we WILL win an award for it. Find out more today!  

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bowling alley animations are my passion, but--alas--I don't know how to animate :/

The "strike" is the best bowling move you can make. It occurs when you hit all of the pins down in one throw. Strikes are easier to achieve if they're deterministic to begin with. E.g.g., you set up a Blender scene and ensure that the ball moving at 100kmph will hit the pins dead on. Then they're almost guaranteed. You know how long it took me to make a five second animation of bowling pins, all so I could get one cool screenshot to put on my stupid little website? Way too long, that's how. 

The "strike" is also an effective way for workers to earn the rights that they deserve! Glenndynamics doesn't have workers, but if we did, by golly we would treat them well! 

To learn how glenndynamics' powerful yet affordable server rentals can help you with your rendering needs, click the button below! 

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our key value propositions

Gaslight

I buy a lot of eggs, so if you need a lightweight, yet rigid container, I may be able to make something for you!  

GATEKEEP 

I don't know how to change this icon. We don't have a forklift. I did investigate forklift certification at one point in time, but I never went through with it. Mainly because I work on a computer, and would have absolutely no reason to become forklift certified except to be able to brag to my friends and colleagues that I'm forklift certified. Which really isn't the best justification for spending the time and money to get forklift certified, so I don't think I'll do it. Plus, I really don't have room to store a forklift, let alone the money to purchase one here in my small, expensive, san francisco apartment. 

GIRLBOSS

I figured out how to change the icons after I wrote the last two paragraphs, but I didn't want to change them because I thought they were kind of funny, lmao, so here we are. That's definitely a girlboss move, if i do say so myself

WE HAVE A STORE!!!

Check out the store link to buy things. I think the only thing on there is the tuber pro, but there should be more products coming soon. you can't actually buy them directly lol. The store is more or less a joke too, just like the whole concept of glenndynamics, but I would kind of like you to be able to actually make a purchase. But that would mean I would actually have to do something when people order things, so I kind of think that it is better that it doesn't work. Less work for me that way. A true girlboss move lmaoo.

THERE IS A SPECTRE HAUNTING EASTERN EUROPE

goddess, I wish the spectre would haunt the continental united states too... iykyk